I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
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I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost