last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i love accidental penises.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
tell me about the fingering
Randomize