were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
