I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
