I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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