i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
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Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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