Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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