But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
