someone threw a dead crab at me
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize