it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize