Texts From Last Night

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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!

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  (318): omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!! http://tfl.nu/wtbk
  Replies (14) Good night (1311) Bad night (1659)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."

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  (901): i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight." http://tfl.nu/7ug8
  Replies (29) Good night (4376) Bad night (1047)
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  (650): View more from California

  i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.

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  (650): i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text. http://tfl.nu/726d
  Replies (44) Good night (1389) Bad night (4061)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..

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  (314): Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is.. http://tfl.nu/1wrs
  Replies (50) Good night (2348) Bad night (9547)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love

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  (609): He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love http://tfl.nu/lok4
  Replies (47) Good night (3555) Bad night (7617)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out

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  (508): he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out http://tfl.nu/cxh0
  Replies (8) Good night (4134) Bad night (980)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...

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  (416): Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card... http://tfl.nu/vpen
  Replies (9) Good night (4313) Bad night (982)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over

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  (443): We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over http://tfl.nu/j0uq
  Replies (5) Good night (1915) Bad night (769)
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  (845): View more from New York

  officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.

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  (845): officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand. http://tfl.nu/8nd1
  Replies (7) Good night (1601) Bad night (990)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself

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  (401): I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself http://tfl.nu/9jsd
  Replies (12) Good night (1599) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.

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  (574): He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle. http://tfl.nu/u8g2
  Replies (4) Good night (457) Bad night (1204)
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  (760): View more from California

  If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right

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  (760): If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right http://tfl.nu/o2q4
  Replies (3) Good night (727) Bad night (427)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.

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  (786): When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock. http://tfl.nu/2333
  Replies (3) Good night (851) Bad night (376)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.

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  (908): I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season. http://tfl.nu/j0x5
  Replies (2) Good night (698) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.

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  (334): I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride. http://tfl.nu/5x6l
  Replies (4) Good night (354) Bad night (170)

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