Texts From Last Night

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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.

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  (270): Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse. http://tfl.nu/tvyi
  Replies (19) Good night (3636) Bad night (1022)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.

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  (517): the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into. http://tfl.nu/bckk
  Replies (14) Good night (2955) Bad night (1806)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far

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  (609): We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far http://tfl.nu/58dc
  Replies (11) Good night (5757) Bad night (1203)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.

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  (778): Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night. http://tfl.nu/vt5l
  Replies (8) Good night (3819) Bad night (1615)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.

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  (219): Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine. http://tfl.nu/fc29
  Replies (6) Good night (3710) Bad night (1270)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class

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  (336): just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class http://tfl.nu/i0x8
  Replies (6) Good night (510) Bad night (1465)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.

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  (636): You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults. http://tfl.nu/yz23
  Replies (4) Good night (2175) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.

  (1-715): View more from Wisconsin

  I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)

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  (715): If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real. (1-715): I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;) http://tfl.nu/oqj0
  Replies (2) Good night (991) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours

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  (518): We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours http://tfl.nu/zbw4
  Replies (9) Good night (972) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard

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  (610): I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard http://tfl.nu/mt5d
  Replies (3) Good night (1242) Bad night (322)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend

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  (602): Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend http://tfl.nu/pyzq
  Replies (4) Good night (269) Bad night (630)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...

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  (702): there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya... http://tfl.nu/edke
  Replies (6) Good night (581) Bad night (1009)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.

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  (208): Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice. http://tfl.nu/e14u
  Replies (10) Good night (1080) Bad night (311)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!

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  (818): Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security! http://tfl.nu/7slr
  Replies (2) Good night (236) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat

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  (214): I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat http://tfl.nu/en4k
  Replies (4) Good night (561) Bad night (254)

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