Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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