I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
love makes seman taste better
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
