I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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