that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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