They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
