i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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