I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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