Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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