i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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