The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
