i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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