One girl and one boy is just not enough.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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