and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
