Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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