I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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