my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
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You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
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No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
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