I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Randomize
