Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I'm like, not good at living.
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