i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize