Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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