i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
