I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
