i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I look better un-naked...
im holly from the hills drunk
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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