Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
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