We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
