in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
