The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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