I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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