he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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