I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
