Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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