when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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