I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
