I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize