I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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