If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
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