Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
