I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
