I need help removing her.
wanna go halves on a baby?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
