Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
