Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize